


It's Confession Time

by Sevnaria



Series: We are here [4]
Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Angst and Humor, Canon Compliant, Confessions, First Kiss, Happy Ending, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Yoo Kihyun-centric, non-beta'd
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-19
Updated: 2019-05-19
Packaged: 2020-03-08 03:03:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18885865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sevnaria/pseuds/Sevnaria
Summary: Kihyun has hidden his crush on Hyunwoo since No Mercy and when the members find out they decide to take action.





	It's Confession Time

“You cannot be serious Minhyuk, that’s not fair.”

“I am and it is. You have got to tell him, I honestly don’t know why you haven’t already. Even Hyungwon and Hoseok managed to get their shit together and they were both being oblivious, at least you’re aware of your feelings.”

“Language, and you’re making it sound like he likes me back but you have no evidence to support it, so stop it.”

Jooheon decided he had heard enough and opened the door. 

“Sorry to disturb, but I came to get you and couldn’t help but overhear. Isn’t it about time you told him already?”

Kihyun paled and couldn’t say anything as Jooheon came into his room and joined the other two on the bed. 

“I, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Kihyun cringed inwardly at how unconvincing he sounded.

“I’m talking about your long ass crush on our dear leader.” 

“How do you even, we didn’t say who…” Kihyun trailed off and turned to look at Minhyuk, who quickly averted his eyes. “You traitor!”

“Well, what was I supposed to do then?” Minhyuk crossed his arms. “You have been coming to me to gush about Hyunwoo and so in turn I needed someone to complain about you to.”

“Yeah, but don’t worry, I haven’t talked to anyone else.” Jooheon mimed zipping up his lips. 

Kihyun let out an exasperated sigh and rubbed his temples while trying to figure out how to not explode. Jooheon finding out wasn’t too bad, unlike Minhyuk he actually knew how to keep his mouth shut and he was a good listener. He’d also been really supportive of Hyungwon and Hoseok ever since they started dating so Kihyun knew he didn’t have a problem with the idea of two men together. 

“I think it’s kind of sweet how you’ve been in love with him for so long and selflessly refrained from telling him, although it’s also really stupid.” 

“Okay, first of all, how much have Minhyuk told you?”

“Relax, I didn’t tell him about how I found out”, Minhyuk winked and Kihyun wanted to punch him. But he was relieved to know that Jooheon hadn’t heard about the incident that Minhyuk referred to as simply ‘the time with the sweater’, he didn’t need another person constantly teasing him for it. And he wasn’t sure he would survive the humiliation if anybody else found out. 

“He just told me that you’ve liked Hyunwoo since No Mercy and that you’re dead set on never telling him. Which, again, is stupid.”

“Don’t you realise that telling him is what would be stupid and potentially fatal for the group,” Kihyun formed his hands into fists in his lap. “He’s not even into guys and even if he by some miracle were, there’s no chance he would be into me. Why can’t you see that?” Kihyun’s voice had been steadily rising and he was almost shouting. Jooheon tentatively put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed. 

“Kihyun, you never told anyone that you were into guys either”, he points out. “With the dating ban and everything, we’ve never really discussed sexuality and stuff among ourselves. Before Hyungwon and Hoseok, we didn’t even know what everyone thought about same-sex relationships. I don’t know if or when they would have come out if Minhyuk hadn’t caught them.” The other male grinned proudly, flashing his teeth and Jooheon rolled his eyes before continuing. “And thankfully everyone has seemed alright with it, but just as you haven’t told the rest of the group, Hyunwoo might also be in a similar situation. I know that’s true for-” Jooheon cut himself off before saying too much. 

“What we’re saying is”, Minhyuk smoothly continued, “don’t write him off just yet. Give it a chance at least and see what happens, I don’t think Hyunwoo would hold it against you even if he doesn’t feel the same. You know he’s not like that.”

And Kihyun did know that, Hyunwoo would probably apologize for not liking Kihyun back and be kind about it. But the thing is, he would still know, and Kihyun couldn’t risk the awkwardness that would surely follow and stay with them for god knows how long. 

“I’m grateful that you guys care and I get it, but I just can’t tell him”, he looked at Jooheon and then Minhyuk, managing a smile. “I’ve hidden it until now and I will continue to do so but I don’t want you to worry, I’m completely fine remaining by his side as a friend.” 

Jooheon surprised Kihyun by pulling him into a bone-crushing hug. When Kihyun squeezed out that he couldn’t breathe the other let go. 

“Alright”, Jooheon said and stood up. “As you wish.” 

He walked towards the door and turned around with his hand on the handle. “I originally came to tell you that the chicken has arrived, the rest are already eating.”

Minhyuk jumped up at his words while Kihyun moved towards the closet. 

“You go ahead, I’ll just change into a more comfortable shirt.” 

Minhyuk and Jooheon left the room and closed the door behind them, looking at each other. 

“Are you really alright with that?” Minhyuk quirked an eyebrow. 

“Of course not”, Jooheon smirked. “And I’m guessing you have a plan?” 

“Obviously, who do you think I am?”

~~~

Several days had passed since he’d talked with Jooheon and Minhyuk and Kihyun really should have seen it coming. How could he have been so stupid and trusted them to actually back off and not meddle when he knew what they were like. He really only had himself to blame, which annoyed him to no end. 

It had started the day after their conversation, during practice. Minhyuk had asked Hyungwon and Hoseok to help him get more water while Jooheon had dragged Changkyun out with him to go over their parts for the new album. 

At first, Kihyun had thought nothing of it as he and Hyunwoo had taken a short break before deciding to continue practicing even if the others hadn’t come back yet. Thirty minutes passed like this and while the rappers might very well have gotten lost in whatever they were doing, it couldn’t possibly take that long to go and get water. 

That’s when Kihyun realized what was happening. He turned to Hyunwoo, who didn’t seem to notice anything weird about the situation, and said that he was going to the bathroom. Without waiting for an answer, Kihyun stalked out of the room and nearly fell over a pair of legs as the door shut behind him. They belonged to Hyungwon, who sat next to the others right outside, bottles of water in his lap. They all looked guilty and Kihyun wanted to shout at them before remembering that Hyunwoo would probably hear and wonder what was going on. So he took a deep breath and met each of their scared gazes.

“I’m going to the bathroom and if you’re not inside when I get back, I can’t guarantee that all of you will wake up tomorrow, or ever again.” He walked away, grinning when he heard how the others hurriedly got to their feet.

He didn’t know if Minhyuk or Jooheon had told the others everything but Kihyun suspected that they had at least told them some portion of it. 

 

Hoseok had come up to him the next day and apologized for taking part in Minhyuk’s plan and then invited Kihyun to work out with him. Kihyun was a bit suspicious but knew that he should take Hoseok up on his offer, it had been a while since he’d last gone to the gym. So he accepted and they agreed to meet at the company gym after lunch. 

When Kihyun got there and Hoseok was nowhere to be seen, he assumed the other was running a little late and so he started stretching by himself. A couple of minutes later, Hyunwoo walked in and Kihyun’s breath hitched as he took in the appearance of the other. Hyunwoo had on a tank top and some tightly fitted shorts, which left very little to the imagination. As he noticed Kihyun’s stare, the other blushed and looked down. 

“Apparently, Jooheon had accidentally put all my work out clothes in the washing machine, so Hoseok lent me some.” Kihyun forced himself to close his gaping mouth and took a look around. 

“And where is he? Hoseok, I mean.”

“Oh, he said something came up and told me to keep you company instead. I was going to come here for a quick session anyway so.” Hyunwoo smiled and Kihyun’s plans to murder the rest of their members would have to wait. 

Although Kihyun had a hard time focusing on anything but Hyunwoo, he somehow got through the workout without jumping the other’s bones. As they walked back to the dorm, they talked about random things and by the time they got back, Kihyun had almost forgotten about everything else. Until he entered the living room and locked eyes with Hoseok who sat on the couch with Hyungwon and Minhyuk. 

“So, something came up, did it?” Kihyun’s eyes flashed dangerously.

Hoseok stood up and backed away slowly, arms stretched out before him. He was about to say something when Jooheon came into the room and stopped in his tracks as he noticed Kihyun turning his gaze to the rapper. Hoseok grabbed Jooheon’s arm, shouted “run” and they made a break for it as Khyun started towards them. 

The two culprits spent two hours locked inside the bathroom until Hyungwon made Kihyun promise not to kill them if they came out. He reluctantly complied but made sure to smack them both over their heads as soon as they left their hideout. They apologized but when they were all sitting down to eat later, Hoseok asked Hyunwoo how the workout had been and everyone but Kihyun and Hyunwoo had burst out laughing. Thankfully, the leader didn’t ask what was so funny and instead recounted which exercises they’d done.

 

After that, Kihyun decided he’d had enough and if anger didn’t work, maybe sincerity would. Although he hated making himself vulnerable, this had gone on for too long. So he gathered everyone but the leader in the kitchen one night, having sent Hyunwoo on an errand to the grocery store to keep him away for a while.

“I think you all know why I’ve gathered you here”, he began and the other’s nodded, looking both worried and guilty. 

“Honestly, I don’t think it’s been that bad”, Minhyuk immediately defended himself. “All we’ve done is given you some time together and frankly I don’t think-” 

Kihyun slammed his hand down on the table and stood up. 

“I asked you to leave it alone, told you that I didn’t want anything to change”, Kihyun growled. “I was fine with the way things were, and hopefully still are. I don’t need your worry or pity or anything else, I’m happy with this.”

An uncomfortable silence settled as Kihyun slowly sat down, hiding his face in his hands with his elbows resting on the table. “Please.”

After a few seconds Jooheon spoke up. 

“Are you though,” he hesitated, “happy, I mean?”

They all looked at Kihyun, who didn’t answer. It was Changkyun who first noticed the tremor in the older’s shoulders and he left his seat to walk around the table and pull the other into a hug. When the others realized that Kihyun was crying, they felt awful. Minhyuk sat down on the other side of Kihyun, rubbing his back. 

“I’m sorry”, he said, voice full of regret. “I never should have told Jooheon or the others. I know I suck at keeping secrets but this one was important and not mine to share.”

“And we shouldn’t have gone along with it”, Hoseok said as Hyungwon nodded in agreement.

“I’m sorry too”, Jooheon sounded like he was close to crying as well. “I knew you didn’t want anything to change but I thought that it was just your stubbornness speaking. I just thought that if you and Hyunwoo would spend time together he’d realize something and everything would turn out fine.”

“It’s not a fairytale, I know”, Changkyun murmured into Kihyuns neck. “But I was kinda hoping for a happy ending anyway, you both deserve one.”

Kihyun emerged from Changkyun’s embrace, sniffling and wiping at his wet eyes. 

“I know you all mean well and you’re right, I’m not really happy right now”, he confessed. “I mean, sometimes I am, but it also hurts.” He lets out a hollow laugh and looks over at Hyungwon and Hoseok, sitting closely while holding hands. “I envy you guys so much for having the guts to tell each other how you felt, you have no idea. I just wish that I could be that brave myself, but I can’t.” His voice cracked on the last syllable.

They all turned silent at that, not knowing what else there was to say. Then someone cleared their throat.

“What’s stopping you?”

Six heads snapped towards the door when Hyunwoo entered, holding a couple of bags. His eyes were trained on Kihyun, who seemed frozen in his spot. 

Minhyuk recovered first, and pulled Changkyun with him while gesturing to the others to stand up. 

“It’s been a long day and I think we’ll head to bed,” he announced. “I’m sure Kihyun can help you put the groceries away.” 

Hyungwon and Hoseok quickly followed and Jooheon joined them after a hesitant glance towards Kihyun. 

Hyunwoo dropped the bags on the floor when the other’s were out of sight and sat down next to Kihyun, turned towards him. This seemed to unfreeze the other, who only now realized that they were alone. 

“How much did you…” He started and looked down. 

“I heard you crying”, Hyunwoo said in a low voice. “I didn’t mean to eavesdrop but I knew something had been going on these past few days and if I was the problem I wanted to know. And I guess I was.”

“No”, Kihyun protested. “You’re not the problem, this is all me.”

Hyunwoo looked like he wanted to disagree. 

“Honestly, I didn’t hear everything that clearly and I don’t think I understood exactly what it was all about. I mostly just got that you have something to tell me, but you’re scared to do so?” Hyunwoo waited as Kihyun eventually nodded. He sighed and placed a hand on the other’s knee. “You can tell me anything, alright? I’m trying my best to be a good leader but I know that I’m lacking in the communication department. I just don’t want you to be afraid of me or what I might think.” 

“I know that, all of that”, Kihyun said and finally looked up. “What I’m afraid of is what will happen next, what will happen to us.” 

“I’m not sure what you mean but I’m ready to listen and I promise that I won’t look at you differently no matter what”, Hyunwoo smiled reassuringly and Kihyun wanted to cry again. 

“Okay, just don’t say anything until I’m done. Cause I don’t think I’ll be able to continue if I’m interrupted.” 

“Whatever you need”, Hyunwoo replied and waited while Kihyun took a couple of breaths, 

“I like you”, he started off, not wanting to beat around the bush. 

Hyunwoo sat in silence while Kihyun told him how long he’d been having these feelings and how the others got involved. “The time with the sweater” is not mentioned since Kihyun didn't think it’s that relevant but otherwise he let it all out. Afterwards he felt empty but lighter, he hadn’t realized until now how much energy it had taken to constantly hide his feelings. 

“I’m not good at this”, Hyunwoo said, bringing Kihyun back to reality. 

“It’s okay”, he interjected. “I know that you don’t feel the same and I feel better just having told you, so you really don’t have to say anything.“ 

“No, I mean, I’m not good at talking about feelings and stuff like that”, Hyunwoo elaborated, gesturing vaguely with his hands before moving them to cup Kihyun’s face. “I’m better at showing than telling.” 

Kihyun’s mind went blank as Hyunwoo closed the distance between them and when their lips touched he reflexively reached up to place his hands on Hyunwoo’s shoulders. They were both painfully inexperienced but it felt good nonetheless. All too soon, Hyunwoo pulled back, all red cheeks and glistening eyes. 

“That was”, he began but didn’t know how to describe it.

“Nice”, Kihyun said simply. He leant back and moved his hands to place them on Hyunwoo’s. He hated himself for feeling the need to ask but he had to make sure. “This was not just to comfort me or let me down gently, right? Because if it was, I’d like you to just give it to me straight.” 

He frowned when Hyunwoo let out a giggle. 

“Trust me when I say, nothing about this is straight”, he was full on laughing now and Kihyun couldn’t hold back from joining him, feeling the tension dissipate. 

When they calmed down after a while, Hyunwoo leant forward and kissed Kihyun’s cheek. “I just wish you would have told me sooner, or that I wasn’t such a coward and told you myself.” 

“So how long?” Kihyun inquiried. 

“For a good while now, but I couldn’t put a name on it until Hyungwon and Hoseok happened”, Hyunwoo admitted. “I knew I liked you in a different way than just a friend, but you know, you’re a guy.” 

“Clearly”, Kihyun rolled his eyes but smiled fondly.

“Yeah, and I hadn’t really thought of myself as anything but straight before, so that took some time to take in, I guess.” 

“But now you’ve reached a conclusion?”

“I have”, Hyunwoo smiled widely. “I like you, Yoo Kihyun.”

Kihyun’s hands on Hyunwoo’s faltered for a second before he tightened his grip. 

“Really?” He searched Hyunwoo’s eyes for anything that could be considered a lie but saw only warmth and affection. 

“Really”, Hyunwoo confirmed and then they were kissing again. 

Minutes passed and Kihyun had somehow ended up in Hyunwoo’s lap as they explored each other’s mouths when a sound came from the entrance to the kitchen. They both looked up to see the rest of the members standing there. 

“I must say”, Minhyuk said with a smug look on his face, “I’m getting tired of walking in on you in compromising situations, Kihyun.” 

Kihyun flipped him off and Minhyuk gasped scandalized but then smiled. 

"We're happy for you, but keep it clean in the kitchen alright? We actually eat at that table." Hoseok winked.

Kihyun looked about ready to murder at that, so the members quickly left after congratulating them. He turned his attention back to Hyunwoo, who looked like he held back a laugh.

"I don't understand how you can be so calm, doesn't it get to you too?" Kihyun asked as he clasped his hands behind Hyunwoo's neck.

The other nuzzled his nose near Kihyun's ear and kissed his neck which elicited a low moan from Kihyun. 

"Not really", he answered. "I'm too happy to care about anything but you right now."

Kihyun didn't know what to say to that, his heart felt like it was about to burst out of his chest and he forced Hyunwoo's head back so he could look him in the eyes. 

"I love you", he blurted out, which was not at all what he intended to say. To his relief, Hyunwoo looked happy instead of ready to run for the hills.

"I love you too", he responded and caressed Kihyun's cheek. “And I will visit you in prison after you murder the others.” 

Kihyun scoffed and he was about to tell the other to shut up but decided to instead connect their lips. Sometimes, showing really was better than telling.

**Author's Note:**

> This turned out to be longer than I planned but I decided to just go ahead and post it as soon as I had written it. It's probably a bit messy and there might be mistakes but I hope you enjoyed it anyway!


End file.
